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The Dark Side of Same-Sex MarriageNew Jersey divorce lawyer John Patti recently went on the record with CBS New York to discuss the “dark side” of same-sex marriage, which is pretty much the “dark side” for all marriages — divorce. There has been such a heavy emphasis placed on the marriage side of the equation, that not as much attention has been paid to this.

Patti believes that it won’t be long before this starts to become a factor for same-sex marriages the same way that it is for heterosexual marriage.

“They’re going to be entitled to the same benefits, but they’re going to also be entitled to the same exposures,” Patti said.

Those exposures include child support, alimony, and dividing assets. Patti expects that the full extent of same-sex divorce will not be truly known until the 10-year mark of the Supreme Court’s landmark decision, but that divorce lawyers in all 50 states should be getting ready to tread into this new territory nonetheless.

It’s going to take time for the people to work their way through the courts for this to happen. They don’t happen overnight,” Patti told the news site.

And for any who may be under the assumption that #LoveWins is a forever kind of thing, he has the same message that he does for all married people.

“Before you get to me, before you get to a divorce attorney, make sure this is the person you want spend your life with.”

To make sure you’re doing just that, the same tenets apply.

  • Can you trust one another?
  • Are you in a giving relationship where you both try to outdo one another when it comes to meeting the other’s needs?
  • How well do you handle disagreements?
  • Do you plan on having children?
  • What are your core beliefs with regard to raising children?
  • What are your spiritual or religious beliefs?
  • How are you both when it comes to handling money?

Whether you are in a same-sex or heterosexual marriage, it’s a good idea to have the answers to all these questions before making a commitment to your partner. No one wants a marriage to end in divorce, and the more closely aligned two people are on these things, the better chance they won’t. Good luck!

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