MyDivorcePapers Blog

What are some behaviors that affect marriage? In other words, what are some things to look out for that you may not otherwise notice as being abnormal? What is a healthy level of behavioral abnormalities in marriage, and excess that is causing problems?

 

Well, only you can know, in your gut, whether or not a behavior is making you feel sad, depressed, or uncomfortable. But here are some common reasons you are unhappy in your current marriage, and some ways to minimize problems in marriage so you can live a happy, fulfilled life with or without your partner.

 

1. There is emotional or physical abuse. We all can say hurtful things when we are upset. This is different than being emotionally abused on a daily basis, or a victim or domestic abuse. Neither emotional nor physical abuse is ever normal in any marriage. Unfortunately, there does not seem to be too many ways to fix these problems in marriage, especially with physical abuse.

 

According to HealthyPlace.com, Emotional abuse can be especially sneaky because, “while abuse is taking place, no physical marks or scars ever appear. Often the only sign that something is wrong in an emotionally abusive relationship is the feeling that something is amiss.” If you are in an emotionally or physically abusive marriage, it is time to consider how damaging it is to your life, so you can start planning the next step.

 

2. Constant crisis mode. Are you and your partner always running from one crisis to the next? Is there never enough money in the bank; is there always a problem at your child’s school; are you constantly on edge? Marriage shouldn’t be like this. Of course we all stress out from time to time, and go through difficult situations in marriage, but constant chaos is one of the top behaviors damaging your marriage.

 

So figure out ways to get rid of the excess drama. Sure, life is tough, but there has to be some type of reason your marriage is always going through some type of stressful situation. Figure out ways to make more money or spend less money. Start communicating better with your partner in order to prevent future drama from occurring. According to DoctorNerdLove.com, “sometimes the problem isn’t that you’re getting distracted; the problem is that you’re arguing about two entirely different things, or that you have different ideas about what you’re asking for.”

 

In other words, diffuse drama in your relationship by communicating properly and making sure everyone is on the same page. You’ll feel so much better once there is less stress and drama in your marriage.

 

3. Chronic depression or abnormal mental health issues. Do you or your partner suffer from depression, anxiety, or another type of mental health issue? Many times, we ourselves cannot tell that we feel these things until someone else notices. One person who is depressed in a relationship can cause great distress to themselves, and their partner, who may not know how to help. If children are involved, it can become even more stressful, and may lead to them even getting depressed.

 

So what do you do? If you are suffering from depression, start seeking the help you need. Don’t wait for things to get better on their own. You have to take care of yourself so you can be a good partner in your marriage. If your partner is the one suffering, talk to them gently and openly. Discuss which measures they are willing to take in order to get better. Approach it from a caring, thoughtful place so they feel at ease discussing their feelings.

 

Marriage doesn’t have to be miserable: Don’t let marriage be an unhappy, miserable thing. There are key reasons you are unhappy in your current marriage, and you can learn how to minimize problems in marriage by addressing them properly. Figure out how to handle problems during marriage, and which behaviors are damaging your relationships so you can work to fix them, or in the case of abuse, leave.

 

 

 

 

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