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Do not overdo the marriage proposalBy now you may have heard about this story out of China involving a man who purchased 99 iPhone 6 devices and used them as an intricate way of proposing to his girlfriend. The price tag, according to Huffington Post, was around $80,000 (or twice the man’s salary). As of this time, he hasn’t received an answer (which isn’t a good sign where we’re from).

The story, originally presented on Weibo, China’s social media giant, is a reminder about the fleeting nature of honeymoon-style romance. This is something that people who file for divorce know all too well: it’s not the gesture that is as important as the relationship.

Too many couples today buy in to the Hollywood ideal of the successful relationship where two people meet, fall madly in love, and then end the movie on a high note as if to imply their love will continue on the same way long after the final credits roll. While you can certainly have a strong love after the honeymoon phase is over, it usually isn’t the same love. You grow and mature and that love looks somewhat different 10 years down the road from what it did when you first got together.

While I’m no psychic, I don’t like the chances that the couple in the story above has of avoiding divorce papers if they end up getting married. He organized a grand and fleeting gesture without even knowing if she felt as strongly about the relationship as he did. That’s not a good sign.

Instead of going to great lengths to wow your loved one with an expensive proposal, wedding, or honeymoon, think about the real reasons why you love that person and whether that love is reciprocated with an equal level of intensity. By focusing on the important aspects of your relationship, then whatever comes after will be special no matter how quaint it may be, and you’ll stand a much better chance of keeping the divorce forms out of your relationship.

[Image via Recode]


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